Would you rather eat a burger found on an avenue or from The Avenue?

I’ve lived on a college campus for over a week now and I’ve had a few realizations:

1. Dorms aren’t as cramped as I thought.
2. Dorm bathrooms are somewhat bearable.
3. The food sucks.

Let me elaborate on number 3 a bit more.

Cal Poly has a variety of dining options, but only a limited number of them are open during the summer and if a restaurant is open, it has very limited hours. The Avenue, a food court style eatery where most of our breakfast and lunches are eaten, is only open on the weekdays. Starbucks, where I dutifully go for a piece of marble pound cake every morning (the breads at The Avenue are…lacking), is closed on the weekends. So is the pizza place.

But even if these restaurants are open, I don’t get too excited. The food at The Avenue is about as good as a leftover burger you would find walking down any avenue (or street, or boulevard, or….you get the idea). The different mini-eateries housed in The Avenue include a faux Panda Express (you can taste the difference), a Chic Fil A Express (the only place you can get a “made to order” grilled chicken sandwich in 30 seconds!) a sandwich joint, and a Mexican place. Not in the mood for any of these delectable delights? No problem! Head on over to the Backstage Express pizza window.

This little eatery is tucked away outside and in front of Starbucks but its worth the extra walk from The Avenue. The pizza isn’t exceptional, but it beats everything at The Avenue. You can actually see them making the pizzas! Wow! Plus at only $6 for a personal cheese, the prices aren’t that outrageous either.

But no matter what you end up getting for lunch, you should pig out because when you get to dinner, you’ll start to wish you had picked up the burger on the avenue (or street, or boulevard, or…you still get the idea).

The food at Vista Grande, where I go for dinner, is essentially a small buffet. Every night they have about four different items (a pasta, a meat, veggies, and a bonus) and a salad bar. The salad bar is actually pretty good, but everything else is well….edible!

The pasta varies greatly, from penne with marina sauce, or “chow mein” style noodles, or even “vegetarian lasagna.”

Not in the mood for pasta? Try the mystery meat of the day! The meat could be turkey (you mean that lump is turkey?), chicken (you mean that ball is chicken?) or pork chops (you mean that slap of meat is pork?). No matter which meat they happen to be serving that day, you can always count on one thing: it will be cold, or lukewarm at best.

So as my time at Cal Poly comes to an end, I’ll miss the people, I’ll miss the instructors, and I’ll miss the adrenaline that makes a 10 p.m. “breaking news” conference fun, but I certainly won’t miss the food.